Was It Just Me?

February 15, 2007 | Zambales

When everyone mourned for the death of President Corazon Aquino last two weeks ago, when everyone was watching it on TV, when in newspapers, internet, TV shows, even in Face Book, it was all about her death, when yellow ribbons are tied everywhere, when everyone was talking about it, I wasn't...

Was it just me?

When everyone hated President Gloria Macapagal Arroyo during her last SONA, when a lot of people are throwing their dismay to her, when people were gathered for a rally to protest, when everyone is saying bad things about her, I wasn't...

Was it just me?

When everyone mourned for the death of Michael Jackson, when CNN became all about MJ's death, when suddenly the music world became a Michael Jackson Music only, when everyone was watching the funeral service packed with celebrities in TV, I wasn't...

Was it just me?

Why am I not hooked with national or international major events the way normal people are? Facebook is always flooded with shoutouts, pictures, videos, links, etc, everytime there is a major event. Everyone is talking about. But me, I don't.

I always have this tendency not to join the world when everyone is. I have this tendency to isolate myself from the world. Something that has grown in me since child because of childhood experiences. When things are getting crowded, I escape. I get away from it. I don't enjoy talking about things that are being discussed by everyone. I just don't.

When BED was super duper packed with PLUs last saturday, and when the music was totally wild, when all the hottest PLUs are around, when great friends are there, I left. Not because of the music nor of the great friends, but it's the overwhelming crowd that pushed me to escape again.

Why am I not enjoying large crowds?

I've never been a fan of "barkadas". Too many friends suffocates me. Too many personalities to deal with, too many stories to listen to, and so many "too many" stuff to deal with. On a professional note, I have the blood to deal with those things. I have said before, I have a different character when it comes to my career life. But the other side of me, enjoys being alone in my room, travels alone or with a couple of friends, hang-out with a few, and things like that.

But why do I love being in "palengke" when most of the people does not? Why am I not a fan of exploring food when most of the people enjoy it? Why do I drive with a barefoot when all of the drivers wear shoes? Why am I not attracted to straight guys like other PLUs?

Why when most of them are asking me to cut my "buntot", I refuse. Why when most of them say here's the kind of guy I should date, I choose the "kabaliktaran". Why do I keep on falling with guys that are too far away from me? Why do I always keep things to myself when I have friends who are there to listen?

So many WHYs. So many questions. But I don't actually need to know the answer. I just find it weird knowing how I view, deal, see things differently. I always hear from people, "You are really different", which I don't know if they mean it in a positive or in a negative way. I guess I am really different. But I know I'm not alone. I know there are other souls out there who has the same as mine. But I still think sometimes...

Was it just me?