Ego and Jealousy

What if ang taong lumalandi sa'yo eh may nilalandi pang iba, anong gagawin mo? Magagalit ka ba sa kanya? Pero tama nga bang magalit? Magseselos ka ba? Pero may karapatan ka na nga bang magselos? O iiwas ka na lang?

A good friend of mine shared his sentiments this morning about a guy who's flirting with him but he found out that the guy is also flirting with another guy (nililihim lihim mo pa sa akin ha). Eh di ba maliit lang naman ang mundo. Hay! Kaya etong si friend, ayun, magulo ang reaksyon sa buhay. Hehe. I asked him what is his plan. He said na ititigil na niya. Hindi na daw siya magrereply kapag nagtext yung guy uli (buti naman).

I gave my reaction. I said that, "Natapakan ang Ego mo noh...". He then confirmed and said yes. But another friend who was listening at that time to our conversation asked, "Paano mo malalaman kung ego lang yan o baka selos?". That made us all think. Paano nga ba maa-identify if your reaction is based from ego or from jealousy?

I was trying to convince myself and them that it's just the same. But at some point, I somehow feel na baka may difference nga. So I listened to the conversation muna. Some gave their thoughts on this. Another friend said that ego roots from pride, while jealousy roots from your inner feelings, which makes sense, and somehow gives a difference between the two.

But when I made some research over the net, I found out that jealousy is a side-effect of a mindset that’s rooted in scarcity. Jealousy is the emotion resulting from the notion that another person’s success or happiness somehow diminishes your own, which is parang ganun na nga ang nangyari sa friend ko. Na ang sayang dinudulot nang flirting moments nila nitong guy eh shared by another guy din.

However, from that definition, isn't Jealousy an ego-based notion? So isn't it the same thing? Because nagselos kang merong ibang guy, you decided to stop communicating with the guy because natapakan ang ego mo. So someone won and you lost. It's the double ouch factor. Am I right na iisa lang sila? Siguro bottomline na lang is, these negative emotions are harmful to ourselves and everyone else, kaye delete-delete na lang yang mga yan.

Iisa man o hindi, I guess, it all boils down to the fact na nasaktan tayo dahil may maling nagawa sa atin (o sa friend ko). Lecheng guy yun, pag nakasalubong ko talaga yun sa elevator, hay, titingnan ko siya mula ulo hanggang paa. Hindi siya kagwapuhan para gumanun. Mananakit pa siya nang damdamin, sa kaibigan ko pa. Eh lintek! Nagkamali siya nang tinalo. Hahagisan ko siya nang bola sa mukha!!!